During recovery from drugs or alcohol, your kids might be feeling that change is too difficult or that they do not have the strength to get better. Helping your kids discover their inner strengths can help them push themselves through the challenge of changing for the better. Understanding strengths and interests can help your kids find effective solutions to their problems. You might also benefit from discovering your kid’s strengths to encourage them to continue moving forward when times are tough. Often, when confronted with feelings of depression or low self-esteem, your kid may not realize what they are good at. Their confidence disappears and they may not notice what they are doing right. Depression can have an effect on the body by making us feel physically weak, which in turn affects how we see and think about ourselves. Look through the following ideas to help you with guiding your kids to find their strengths and build solutions to problems:
Spend Time to Think About Your Kid
You probably think about your kid a lot when they are troubled or experiencing emotional pain. Excessive worrying can blur your vision of your child’s future and create feelings of despair within yourself. Try writing out a list of positive one-word descriptions of your kid to prime you to see the great things in them. By narrowing your word choices to one-word, you will be forced to really think about them and create answers that you can recall easily when your kid needs some positive reinforcement or praise.
Examine how you feel after finishing an exercise like this. Were you able to notice some of the great things about your kid? When your kids are having problems, you might only think about the problems and get overly focused on negativity. Now that you have some positive, one-word character traits for your kid, you may be able to reinforce some of your kid’s strengths and interests.
Discovering Strengths and Interests
Knowing your kid’s strengths and interests can help you to find positive activities that your kid can engage in to build self-esteem and find purpose. Sometimes, strengths and interests go hand in hand. Most people are prone to be interested in activities that they can do well. What are some of the things that your kid likes to do? What are some of the things they do well? Writing down some of these items can help you when scheduling activities or chores around the house. If you are asking your child to complete some chores around the house, why not start by asking them to do things they like or are already good at? Write out a list of things your kid is good at or things they like to do.
Now that you have things written out, you can start to understand what things your kid might be interested in doing that can help them build confidence and self-esteem. If your kid is good at getting up or going to bed on time, then maybe they help with other chores requiring consistency, like watering plants or feeding pets. If your kid enjoys video games, they might enjoy similar strategy games like board games that they can do with you or other family members. If your child enjoys car movies, then maybe they would be interested in helping you check your car’s tire pressure or oil levels. Kids listening to music might be interested in learning an instrument or singing.
Parenting a troubled teen can be difficult. You may not know where to begin and your child might be looking to you for answers. Some things can be simple, like completing one positive activity per day or creating a household routine. By taking some time to write out what your kid is already good at doing or already interested in, you can start to help them notice their own strengths. Once your kid has an understanding of their own strengths, you can encourage them to use their positive traits to find solutions when things are tough. Sometimes, we get so focused on problems, that we forget about the power of building strengths. Encouraging kids when they do something well might help them fill their day up with more rewarding and positive activities.
By guiding your child through difficult times and helping them create a consistent routine, you can help them ease their feelings of uncertainty and insecurity about the world. By reinforcing your child with praise about their positive qualities, you remind them of their best selves. You also encourage them to look for the good when things seem tough.
Fire Mountain encourages troubled kids to look at their positive traits and strengths. We believe that instilling positive messages to kids by reinforcing their good qualities can help kids find value in themselves. When kids value themselves, they feel like they can contribute to their families and to the world. They begin to plan for a better future as they build their self-esteem. Often, we focus too much on the things that are going wrong. We forget to see things that are going right. We may neglect to notice or point out the great things about our kids. Taking some time to consider what kids enjoy and what they are good at can help us better understand potential solutions for any problems they might be facing. For more information on effective parenting strategies or to help your child, call Fire Mountain at (303) 443-3343.